Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
