dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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