I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize