Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
