...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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