dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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