I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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