Your mouth is God's brothel.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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