walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
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