So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
