put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize