She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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