It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.