Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
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I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line