she was so not down for the gang bang
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
