Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
