Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
