i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
