I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize