I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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