the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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