everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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