dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize