The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
