babies were throwing up all over the place
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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