If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
