we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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