She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Last time i carry you out of a forest
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
