I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
