let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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