i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm too high and old for this...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
