So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
