Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize