just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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