I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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