I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
