Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
We are two peas in an std pod
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
