Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize