Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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