Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize