I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
