Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
