I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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