I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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