Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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