Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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