Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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