talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
