Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Sheβs fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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