lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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