More tranny stories later!
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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